"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."--John 8:36
I'm embarrassed to say that I've been living for other people. It was bound to come out sometime, but I was not really aware of it until I found myself re-routing my whole life to avoid the "pain" of disappointing others. I went along with it for a while, but knowing at some point it was going to have to end. The Holy Spirit gave me a picture a few weeks ago of a woman with an arrow piercing through her stomach. The arrow was tied to a string on both ends which lifted her entire body off the ground towards the sky. She was clearly in pain--teetering along and standing only on a tight rope--hoping to not make any sudden movements as to avoid the sharp pain through her side. A week later I realized I was the woman, and the arrow I was avoiding was the fear of disappointing people. It seems almost abruptly I made some necessary but difficult decisions that hurt my pride. However, ever since, Jesus has been carefully returning my feet to solid ground.
This "people-pleasing disease"--as I'll call it--has been a hard one to get over. More and more I am thankful for God exposing it when He did, for I will be a married woman in exactly 23 days. As I learned with this past experience, pleasing anyone but God will affect not only myself, but the man closest to me.
Now, I feel sometimes like I am relearning how to function as "free indeed" all over again. The Holy Spirit is now constantly but gently convicting me of other instances where I care more about the opinions of others than His. Usually as I post things God is doing--I have a sweet ending and a conclusion to the story. This one, I think will continue on past this page and more victory will be coming soon.
I'm embarrassed to say that I've been living for other people. It was bound to come out sometime, but I was not really aware of it until I found myself re-routing my whole life to avoid the "pain" of disappointing others. I went along with it for a while, but knowing at some point it was going to have to end. The Holy Spirit gave me a picture a few weeks ago of a woman with an arrow piercing through her stomach. The arrow was tied to a string on both ends which lifted her entire body off the ground towards the sky. She was clearly in pain--teetering along and standing only on a tight rope--hoping to not make any sudden movements as to avoid the sharp pain through her side. A week later I realized I was the woman, and the arrow I was avoiding was the fear of disappointing people. It seems almost abruptly I made some necessary but difficult decisions that hurt my pride. However, ever since, Jesus has been carefully returning my feet to solid ground.
This "people-pleasing disease"--as I'll call it--has been a hard one to get over. More and more I am thankful for God exposing it when He did, for I will be a married woman in exactly 23 days. As I learned with this past experience, pleasing anyone but God will affect not only myself, but the man closest to me.
Now, I feel sometimes like I am relearning how to function as "free indeed" all over again. The Holy Spirit is now constantly but gently convicting me of other instances where I care more about the opinions of others than His. Usually as I post things God is doing--I have a sweet ending and a conclusion to the story. This one, I think will continue on past this page and more victory will be coming soon.
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