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Free Indeed

"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."--John 8:36

I'm embarrassed to say that I've been living for other people. It was bound to come out sometime, but I was not really aware of it until I found myself re-routing my whole life to avoid the "pain" of disappointing others. I went along with it for a while, but knowing at some point it was going to have to end. The Holy Spirit gave me a picture a few weeks ago of a woman with an arrow piercing through her stomach. The arrow was tied to a string on both ends which lifted her entire body off the ground towards the sky. She was clearly in pain--teetering along and standing only on a tight rope--hoping to not make any sudden movements as to avoid the sharp pain through her side. A week later I realized I was the woman, and the arrow I was avoiding was the fear of disappointing people. It seems almost abruptly I made some necessary but difficult decisions that hurt my pride. However, ever since, Jesus has been carefully returning my feet to solid ground.

This "people-pleasing disease"--as I'll call it--has been a hard one to get over. More and more I am thankful for God exposing it when He did, for I will be a married woman in exactly 23 days. As I learned with this past experience, pleasing anyone but God will affect not only myself, but the man closest to me.

Now, I feel sometimes like I am relearning how to function as "free indeed" all over again. The Holy Spirit is now constantly but gently convicting me of other instances where I care more about the opinions of others than His. Usually as I post things God is doing--I have a sweet ending and a conclusion to the story. This one, I think will continue on past this page and more victory will be coming soon.
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