Two weeks ago I attended the Onething conference at the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. This was my first time going down there. It had been a while since I've been able to engage in corporate worship, and it doesn't get much more corporate than 30,000 people this side of heaven. The music began to play and I was surprised how resistant my mind was to forgetting what lies behind and going to God in song.
"Go over to the dance area," He said.
"No...I really am fine over here, God" (about a minute later) "But, God, I want more of you! I want to freely worship without distractions!"
"Then obey Me."
I have always somewhat feared the role of God called the Holy Spirit. I've thought that to receive more of Him it meant seizing on the floor and foaming at the mouth uncontrollably (the latter is obviously an exaggeration). However, with the simple act of obedience, those things that bound my mind from freedom to worship were gone and I felt and knew I was about to receive more of Him. I didn't seek the emotions, but they came with as well. It felt great to be loved.
And the Spirit did not multiply anything in my heart but His peace and warmth like one finds curled up on a couch with a cup of coffee. He became more familiar, and more delightful than any Pumpkin Spice latte. I find it funny that He will use some of the simplest delights of life to compare His Presence. God's acquaintance will often remind me of the sentiments I get from Christmas morning or Norah Jones' voice on a rainy day (but the kind rendered by the Spirit are inexhaustible!).
After being back from the conference, I also have discovered that this new time of communion and exchange between the Lord and I (sometimes referred to as Husband now--for some obvious reasons) is what He has been after all along. No WONDER this world will kill and fight to pervert the exchange between Bride and Groom. We long to be closely known and understood but fear vulnerability to get there, so somehow it spills out in a manner that we deem to be "safer" (endless rom-com movies, books, or your Facebook status--sheesh, even my blog!).
It really has taken me this lifetime to realize the closeness of His countenance. The Martha mentality has put up a good fight, but it just so happens that in worship on Tuesday morning, Jesus wrestled me to the ground (in my mind's eye) after I asked how much He loved me. I laughed because I can imagine that is what I needed. "I love you this much, and sometimes you need to be pinned to the ground to save you from becoming a Martha again."
"As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."--Luke 10:38-42
I rather like this:
"Go over to the dance area," He said.
"No...I really am fine over here, God" (about a minute later) "But, God, I want more of you! I want to freely worship without distractions!"
"Then obey Me."
I have always somewhat feared the role of God called the Holy Spirit. I've thought that to receive more of Him it meant seizing on the floor and foaming at the mouth uncontrollably (the latter is obviously an exaggeration). However, with the simple act of obedience, those things that bound my mind from freedom to worship were gone and I felt and knew I was about to receive more of Him. I didn't seek the emotions, but they came with as well. It felt great to be loved.
After being back from the conference, I also have discovered that this new time of communion and exchange between the Lord and I (sometimes referred to as Husband now--for some obvious reasons) is what He has been after all along. No WONDER this world will kill and fight to pervert the exchange between Bride and Groom. We long to be closely known and understood but fear vulnerability to get there, so somehow it spills out in a manner that we deem to be "safer" (endless rom-com movies, books, or your Facebook status--sheesh, even my blog!).
It really has taken me this lifetime to realize the closeness of His countenance. The Martha mentality has put up a good fight, but it just so happens that in worship on Tuesday morning, Jesus wrestled me to the ground (in my mind's eye) after I asked how much He loved me. I laughed because I can imagine that is what I needed. "I love you this much, and sometimes you need to be pinned to the ground to save you from becoming a Martha again."
"As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."--Luke 10:38-42
I rather like this:
Gotta love IHOP :) But even better... is Him. I just love how easy I can enter into His presence while worshiping there. But it has opened my heart and taught me how to receive His love in the same way anywhere in the world. It's such a joy to read how He is revealing Himself to you!
ReplyDeleteCasey I agree! To finish the story, I was coming home thinking, "Gee, I hope God 'follows' me home..." and He DID!! It's like once you go forward you cannot go back. How wonderful :)
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